tulipesbouquet

Show the World How to Make you Happy

Good day, my Wonderful Friend!

 

I was walking by the flower shop a few days ago and saw beautiful tulips of different colors. I stopped and stepped closer towards the bucket of fresh pink tulips. I felt that they were calling my name: “Hey Gulnara, come closer, smell me, bring me home with you, I know you love beauty, I promise to draw even more beauty into your life and uplift your spirit every time you glance at me” – whispered one pale pink tulip, sticking out tall from the bucket.

A few minutes later I was walking home with a bouquet of pink tulips wrapped in brown craft paper in hand. As I was trimming the stems and placing the flowers into a vase, I was overwhelmed with happiness. I began to think about all the years I have been walking by flower shops, with different flowers calling me each time. Sometimes they were roses, other times daisies or peonies. I would walk by with a hope in my heart that someone else, someday, would bring or send me such beautiful flowers, either as an expression of love or merely knowing that they would bring me happiness and joy.

A few years ago I was passing by a flower shop and at this time it was yellow roses that were calling for me. That day I decided to stop waiting and hoping that someone else would bring me flowers, and instead bought them for myself. That day I was able to show myself self-love by taking action.

I remember loving flowers ever since I was a little girl, and today flowers continue to be the first thing I notice wherever I go. As I reflect on this, I find myself asking: “Why couldn’t I buy them for myself before?” Perhaps I was so preoccupied with seeking love from others as opposed to connecting to the love within myself. I thought that if people loved me, they would know what I liked and want to give that to me. What I forgot, however, is that one of the most important people to show me LOVE is actually ME.

You may have heard the saying, “love is a verb, not a noun.” Without love being active it loses its significance and power. With this in mind, I have a question for you: If love is an action, then how many small or significant acts do you take daily to show yourself love and appreciation?

The day I bought myself yellow roses, was the day I first SHOWED myself that I deserve to be loved and to be surrounded by beauty. Now, if flowers call upon me in the flower shop, I no longer walk away hoping that someone else will bring them to me. Instead, I take it upon myself to buy them. Sometimes I’ll choose to buy a big glamorous bouquet and other times a small and simple bunch of wildflowers. There are even days that I buy myself just a single flower. It’s not the number of flowers or the grandness of the bouquet that makes me happy, it’s the fact that I take action to buy them for myself and enrich my life with natural beauty. I choose to be active, and not passive, in my expression of self-love.

If you love flowers, go get them for yourself. We often use flowers for celebratory purposes and wait for others to give them to us. However, we don’t always need a particular reason to have flowers – embrace your love for flowers, or whatever it is for you that brings you joy.

No matter how challenging or puzzling your life might seem to you right now, please know that it isn’t permanent. Throughout it all, you deserve to celebrate YOU! Explore yourself, get to know what you love and find a way to give it to yourself, be it a flower, a book, a dinner, or a course that you always wanted to take. You are responsible for discovering your authentic desires and needs, the things that fulfill you and make you stronger.

We teach people how to love us. When you show the world what you love by giving it to yourself, there is a very high chance that the world will follow your example and start showing you more love and appreciation as well.

With Love,

Conceptual yoga hands in morning sunlight.

Focus on Your Inner Power

Good day my Wonderful Friend!

 

There is one important thing that I have realized after many years of coaching, counseling, researching and writing for and about women. I have come to the conclusion that we become connected to the beautiful flow of life only when have obtained inner power, and a strong sense of self-acceptance. We start feeling connected with this unstoppable force that people call God, the Universe, the macrocosm, and that we start feeling aligned with and supported by everything around us. When we find that sense of connection, we no longer feel lonely, detached or isolated.

When we do find inner power, we can interact with the world from a place of strength, joy, and mental and emotional generosity. I hope that my inspirational writing will help you to feel happier, more liberated and stronger in order to give the world around you your best talents, skills, and your incredible presence when you spread the inner light wherever you go….

I always find it helpful to focus on inner power, cultivate it, and continue building it even when I feel having so little energy left to move forward. This worked for me, even though it took me some time to build my strength.

Spend time understanding yourself, what makes you happy and what you really want. Do not waste your time explaining yourself to people who have already made up their minds about you. You have two choices here.

Choice # 1: you might choose to move on and remove yourself from the company of those toxic, unsupportive or jealous people.

Choice # 2 is for the people you cannot remove from your life (i.e., family members).

The only way to change their minds about you is not by explaining yourself and your behavior, but by living your dreams and reaching your highest potential, even if it takes longer than you might want. Make sure to follow your dreams and desires for YOU and not for anyone else, and don’t forget to have fun in the process!

Do you want to spend your wonderful life trying so hard to please others or to convince them that you are worthy of love? You know, we humans all have different journeys in life. Unfortunately, some people are not ready to change, they feel stuck and self-critical; therefore they criticize you.  Some people have a notorious tendency to judge others, for the same reason – they judge others because they continuously judge themselves. Anyway, arguing with them or trying to changing their minds about you is just going to be a waste of your valuable time.

What is the best thing to do? Just let them be and wish them well, perhaps these individuals are at the stage of life where they are not ready to grow or better themselves, at least at this point of their life. Respect their pace of growth and life choices. Focus on YOU, your vision and your actions. Concentrate on things you can control, and make a conscious commitment to follow your dreams and goals, in order to reach the peak of your potential.

Trust me, I wasn’t always smart and wise, and there were times when I made mistakes by doing the wrong things or focusing on unimportant stuff. I could not find any energy to move forward. The best motivation that pushed my change was not the desire to prove myself to people (who I thought disapproved of me or rejected me). The best motivation came from a focus on a burning passion in my heart to do something meaningful, something that was within my personal power, own agency and skill set.

I have a few questions for you, my friend:

Question # 1: What can you be passionate about for an unusually long time, something that you know you won’t lose interest in?

Question # 2: What value can you bring to people around you and prosper while offering your unique skills?

(Many years of coaching and observing happy people helped me realize that doing what you love and sharing your gifts with people will help you to expand yourself, your mind and your soul).

Question # 3: How can you gain more energy to leap into something new and exciting?

Like an athlete that prepares for an Olympic final, you will need to train your mind and your heart to build your energy RESERVE, my friend.

What would be the first steps to increase and maintain your energy RESERVE?

  1. Remove from your daily routine things that deplete your energy.
  2. Explore what makes you strong and introduce routines/habits/activities that increase your energy.
  3. Stay away from judging or blaming others–this is a waste of your energy.
  4. Re-focus your attention from changing the external world into your personal transformation and consistent growth.
  5. Encourage yourself to take risks and take actions towards your dreams, even if your risks are small and your goals are baby-goals.

This approach is much more authentic, healthy and liberating than trying to prove yourself to others. You focus on YOU and what YOU can do, end of the sentence. It’s OK to ask others for help, but this is your journey, and you need to start walking it. The Universe – in the form of helpful people and favorable life circumstances – will meet you in the middle, but you have to start somewhere by YOURSELF.

One more thing, my dear, please switch off that harsh voice of your inner critic and write down all the things that you feel happy doing. Try to remember all the times when people complimented you on your unique skills, and when they praised you on specific quality. List all those compliments down, reflect upon them, find patterns and consistency in what brings you the most satisfaction and joy.

When you finally switch off the voice of the inner critic, focus on what you love doing and concentrate on developing your talent, you will obtain clarity and power to bring your unique gift to the world. When you keep focusing on your inner strength, you will begin to feel more powerful.

I am sure that you do have what it takes to find your path. Just believe in yourself more each and every day.  I have a feeling that very soon you will find the path that will lead you to a fulfilling life when every single morning you will wake up with a smile on your face and a deep sense of purpose.

I am sending you my light and warmest wishes for this prosperous year ahead!

With Love,

Photo of adorable small child and her mother have fun together in bed, tickle each other, smile joyfully, play after good sleep, have good relationships. People, family, motherhood and childhood

A Gift from a Great Mother

Good day my, Wonderful Friend!

 

Today I want to talk about great mothers!

Great mothers are not the ones who are perfect or who act in perfect ways in front of their kids.

Great mothers know their own imperfections, and yet they choose to focus on their strengths. They are approaching parenting from the standpoint of inner power and self-acceptance, not from self-judgment or self-doubt.

Great mothers know their children’s imperfections and flaws, and yet choose to focus on their children’s strengths and uniqueness.

Great mothers raise their children with a continuous commitment to growth and self-discovery. They understand that parenting is for the “long-run journey,” the journey where they will never retire from the title of a “MOTHER.”

Great mothers choose to take this journey as an opportunity to become a better daughter, a better friend, a better partner, and a better human being. She knows one thing very clearly: is that during her long-run journey, her children will learn from her mistakes, her commitment to improving herself and her commitment to the world. There is a very high chance that children will learn from her and her ever-growing thirst to live a meaningful life.

Great mothers know that one of the most important things she can offer to her children is her own example of living, learning, making mistakes, overcoming and winning.

Great mothers know that it’s not how big the wins are, but how consistent is her commitment to self-growth and self-acceptance of herself as a special human being with a unique gift on this planet. From that place, Great Mother can give to their children without completely depleting herself, because she lives in a constant flow of love.

Great mothers have the wisdom of knowing that when they accept themselves when they know that making mistakes is an integral part of growth, they give their children the most beautiful gift of confidence any child can receive from a parent.

Great mothers give their children a beautiful GIFT OF ACCEPTANCE of who they are and a GIFT OF ENCOURAGEMENT for trying new things, even if that “trying” period leads to challenges.

Great Mothers are everywhere! Are you one of them?

If not yet, what steps can you take today toward becoming a Great Mother?

With Love,